Killing flashbacks

don't worry, you have escaped!

I wish I could just die!

We all have those moments we cringe so hard or want to scream so loud whenever we have flashback of them. Sometimes, It eats deeply into our brains we even tell ourselves "I wish I could just die" out of regret or shame of could have done- Yes,We all do. WAIT, WE ALL DO, RIGHT? RIGHTTT??.

If you've been here from onset,you would have read my article on "how to escape from mental death" ,so you can trust me with this as well or you read the article- I said I had psychosis- I guess you can fully trust me on mental predicaments. After my psychosis episodes which was caused by feelings repression and overthinking,I was given a drug that made me forget things which in the process makes me feel so dull,so I stopped using the drugs thinking I could help myself - I started having a big wave of flashbacks which are mostly shame and regret, I guess the part of living I tried to repressed coming back at me and these are some of methods I used in helping myself:

-When it got too much, I scream it out, yes,I scream. Sometimes my brain tells me commit suicide and I just replied back by saying "I commit suicide" repeatedly- I don't know how but it makes my brain calm

-I know I can't keep up with that method so, I unshame myself, yes, you heard me right?. I unshame myself. You might be wondering how??. Yes, you can unshame yourself by telling yourself "Mariam,If you had known, you would have done better". There's no harm in being kind to yourself, telling yourself what you wish others would tell you.

- I forgive myself by beating my chest in a gentle manner and say "I forgive you,Mariam" - how crazy that sounds cause what do you mean you forgive yourself, yes I believe the part of me screaming from shame or pain wants to meet the part of me that's no longer that kind of person so I let them meet each other.

- Dump it- the sign that you are close to your healing is talking things that were hard for you to keep in your brain to other people and this helps alot because it's like you killed that part and tell it " do whatever you want now , I'm no longer in your bondage”. And start living happily ever after

Disclaimer: Please I don't recommend it,but there's no harm in trying but if it's not working or you think what you feel is bigger than this,you should visit a psychotherapist. As always, I'm rooting for you, the world need your beautiful mind ❤️ .

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